Personal observations on life

How to grow flowers in deserts aka survive in tough times?

Be the Flower that Blooms in the Desert — do-over.me

There are times in life when you feel you just cannot go on. All the negativity, all the lovelessness around gets to you, and you feel all alone in a vast, uncaring world. Getting up each morning becomes a dreadful chore and you wonder why at all you need to prolong this awful agony.

At such times, how do you go on? How do you not quit? Is it possible for some good to come out of you even at these times?

1. Take only one step at a time.

Often, what makes it so dreadful in the morning is the prospect of the whole joyless day stretching ahead of you, with nothing to offer. So, forget about the whole joyless day. Take only one step at a time. Think of only the next one thing to do. It could be as trivial as brushing your teeth, or a little more rewarding as making a cup of coffee for yourself. Once you accomplish that, think of the next thing to do.

2. Go outside

Sunlight brings energy not only to plants, but also to human beings. Go out and breathe in the fresh air. Pick some weeds from your garden if you are lucky to have one. Walk around for about ten minutes or more, without wearing slippers or shoes. Let your skin get in touch with the elements.

3. Reach out to people

You may feel like no one really cares for you, but you are likely to have some contacts who will respond to you if you send a simple ‘hi, how are you’ message. Send to as many people as you can. At least some of them will respond. You will be amazed at how positively people will respond to a random ‘how are you’ message, even if you are not that close to them.

4. Do some self-care

Apply a face mask. Go for a manicure and pedicure or a spa. Full bodies massage works wonders when you are feeling low. If you do not feel up to going to the parlor, see if there is a masseuse who can come to your house. Indulge yourself.

5. Leave some things undone

No need to wash the dishes if you don’t feel like it. No need to do the laundry or fold the clothes. Let the house be dirty for a while. All that can wait for a time when you feel really up to it. Do only those things that take up minimum energy and maximum satisfaction.

6. Say ‘no’

Very often we do not have the luxury of doing the things we want to do, or not doing things we do not want to do. That is when the power of ‘no’ comes to play. When you feel very low, you should say ‘no’ to demands from people for your time or energy, even if it is your own children or partner. And you do not have to feel guilty about it. Remember that you are in recharge mode.

7. Create something

Creating something gives a sense of accomplishment. You could write a blog post, cook some dish for the family, or create a beautiful space by tidying up your table. It could also be as simple as making your bed. If you have flowers in your garden, cut up a few and put them in a vase in your living room.

7. Do not eat for comfort

Finally, whatever you do, do not eat to fill the emptiness inside you. Do not eat when you feel low.  If you have to eat, let it be just fruits or nuts. Eating carbohydrates or nuts will make you feel worse afterwards. Do not seek comfort in food.

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